A lighthearted look at news of the day:
Last week, Ohio voters rejected a ballot measure that would have made recreational marijuana use legal. There is a built-in problem with trying to get out the vote among marijuana users. Most of them are still at home going, “So, when was that vote thingy again?”
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After this, the Buckeye State should be known as Not So-High-O.
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Ohio’s measure was backed by a small group of investors who would have become the state’s sole suppliers of legal marijuana. So the proposal combined the power of big business, which liberals dislike, with the legalization of a drug conservatives dislike. Whoever thought this was a winning strategy must have been high.
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Ben Carson surged ahead of Donald Trump in polls last week. This shouldn’t come as surprise, given that we haven’t seen such a riveting public speaker since Chester A. Arthur.
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It must be difficult for Ben Carson to run in a race where he clearly is so much more learned than everybody else. What sort of attack ad could you hit him with? “Ben Carson may be a brain surgeon, but he’s no rocket scientist!”
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Ben Carson always can assure people that if he doesn’t know the answers, he knows how to put his fingers on the best minds in America.
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Carson has admitted to falling asleep behind the wheel of his car more than once. Doctors reportedly urged him to stop listening to his own campaign speeches while driving.
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Jeb Bush, meanwhile, has launched a new “Jeb can fix it” tour. That may not be the best slogan when your campaign is beginning to break apart.
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At the last Democratic debate, Bernie Sanders said everyone was tired of hearing about Hillary Clinton’s emails. But last week he told the Wall Street Journal the federal investigation into those emails was appropriate. It’s amazing how shifting poll numbers can cure fatigue.
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Utahns learned last week that the future of vote counting looks a lot like the past, as in the 18th century.
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State law keeps election clerks from issuing public updates on vote totals after Election Day, which is a problem when most of the votes are sent in by mail. Final results in Utah won’t be posted until Nov. 17. The biggest problem with this is that the candidates have to keep fresh hors d’oeuvres coming for all those hopeful folks still hanging around their victory parties.
Last week, Ohio voters rejected a ballot measure that would have made recreational marijuana use legal. There is a built-in problem with trying to get out the vote among marijuana users. Most of them are still at home going, “So, when was that vote thingy again?”
---
After this, the Buckeye State should be known as Not So-High-O.
---
Ohio’s measure was backed by a small group of investors who would have become the state’s sole suppliers of legal marijuana. So the proposal combined the power of big business, which liberals dislike, with the legalization of a drug conservatives dislike. Whoever thought this was a winning strategy must have been high.
---
Ben Carson surged ahead of Donald Trump in polls last week. This shouldn’t come as surprise, given that we haven’t seen such a riveting public speaker since Chester A. Arthur.
---
It must be difficult for Ben Carson to run in a race where he clearly is so much more learned than everybody else. What sort of attack ad could you hit him with? “Ben Carson may be a brain surgeon, but he’s no rocket scientist!”
---
Ben Carson always can assure people that if he doesn’t know the answers, he knows how to put his fingers on the best minds in America.
---
Carson has admitted to falling asleep behind the wheel of his car more than once. Doctors reportedly urged him to stop listening to his own campaign speeches while driving.
---
Jeb Bush, meanwhile, has launched a new “Jeb can fix it” tour. That may not be the best slogan when your campaign is beginning to break apart.
---
At the last Democratic debate, Bernie Sanders said everyone was tired of hearing about Hillary Clinton’s emails. But last week he told the Wall Street Journal the federal investigation into those emails was appropriate. It’s amazing how shifting poll numbers can cure fatigue.
---
Utahns learned last week that the future of vote counting looks a lot like the past, as in the 18th century.
---
State law keeps election clerks from issuing public updates on vote totals after Election Day, which is a problem when most of the votes are sent in by mail. Final results in Utah won’t be posted until Nov. 17. The biggest problem with this is that the candidates have to keep fresh hors d’oeuvres coming for all those hopeful folks still hanging around their victory parties.
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