A lighthearted look at news of the day:
Summers in Northern Utah are beautiful! And I’m not just blowing smoke. I’m also breathing it in.
---
People here are never satisfied with the weather. Sure, you’re complaining right now about the smoke, but in a just few months I bet you’ll be complaining just as loud about the smog.
---
Last week, Kentucky Sen. Rand Paul hand-delivered a note from President Donald Trump to Russian President Vladimir Putin. Some people will do anything to save $1.15 in postage.
---
Members of Congress wonder why the U.S. Postal Service can’t turn a profit. Maybe if they stopped hand-delivering letters all over the world that would change.
---
The Trump administration presses forward with its plans to organize a military “space force” just as Patrick Stewart announces he is returning to the star ship Enterprise. Coincidence?
---
So Patrick Stewart is going to reprise his role as Captain Jean-Luc Picard on Star Trek. Admittedly, things will be a little different with a 78-year-old Picard in charge. For one thing, the Enterprise will have to stop at Denny’s every morning so he can get a senior discount on the Grand Slam breakfast. For another, the ship’s mission will be changed to “boldly go … frequently.”
---
The first episode of the new Star Trek will find the Enterprise in peril as alien forces launch an attack on the ship and Picard dangerously delays responding until a Millennial can be found to “help me turn on this stupid computer.”
---
In the next episode, the crew of the Enterprise is sent into panic after realizing Captain Picard unwittingly sold the ship to a telemarketer.
---
Maybe they can bring back William Shatner as Captain Kirk, as well. Then the Enterprise could boldly go negotiate the cheapest price for a hotel stay.
Summers in Northern Utah are beautiful! And I’m not just blowing smoke. I’m also breathing it in.
---
People here are never satisfied with the weather. Sure, you’re complaining right now about the smoke, but in a just few months I bet you’ll be complaining just as loud about the smog.
---
Last week, Kentucky Sen. Rand Paul hand-delivered a note from President Donald Trump to Russian President Vladimir Putin. Some people will do anything to save $1.15 in postage.
---
Members of Congress wonder why the U.S. Postal Service can’t turn a profit. Maybe if they stopped hand-delivering letters all over the world that would change.
---
The Trump administration presses forward with its plans to organize a military “space force” just as Patrick Stewart announces he is returning to the star ship Enterprise. Coincidence?
---
So Patrick Stewart is going to reprise his role as Captain Jean-Luc Picard on Star Trek. Admittedly, things will be a little different with a 78-year-old Picard in charge. For one thing, the Enterprise will have to stop at Denny’s every morning so he can get a senior discount on the Grand Slam breakfast. For another, the ship’s mission will be changed to “boldly go … frequently.”
---
The first episode of the new Star Trek will find the Enterprise in peril as alien forces launch an attack on the ship and Picard dangerously delays responding until a Millennial can be found to “help me turn on this stupid computer.”
---
In the next episode, the crew of the Enterprise is sent into panic after realizing Captain Picard unwittingly sold the ship to a telemarketer.
---
Maybe they can bring back William Shatner as Captain Kirk, as well. Then the Enterprise could boldly go negotiate the cheapest price for a hotel stay.
RSS Feed