A lighthearted look at news of the day:
An Alaska Airlines employee last week fell asleep in the cargo hold of a plane, then had to bang on the ceiling for help when he woke up and discovered the plane was in flight. Officials said this incident should serve as a wakeup call. “Wake up call? That would have been nice,” said the employee who fell asleep.
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ABC News said the sleepy baggage handler has a Facebook page that lists him as having studied “the art of sleeping” at “Sleeping University.” That’s where the mascot is a sloth, every cheerleader is a dream date, exams are a nightmare and the football team is everyone’s favorite sleeper pick.
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The baggage handler would have been safe in the cargo hold, which was pressurized to accommodate pets in transit. But it’s no fun down there. Instead of peanuts, you get complimentary kibble.
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When the plane landed, the baggage handler was overheard telling authorities, “Please don’t tell my boss.”
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Meanwhile, the flying public is just hoping airlines don’t use this as an excuse to cram more people onto each flight. You think flying is rough today. Wait until you long to be upgraded out of the baggage compartment.
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Life is unfair. The baggage handler had an epically subpar day at work, and now he’s in trouble. Jordan Spieth had an epically subpar day at the Masters and he got a brand new green jacket.
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Recent tests show dogs can sniff out prostate cancer in men with 98 percent accuracy. However, the tests also revealed that dinner guests at your house do not appreciate undergoing the procedure.
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It’s true that dogs can sniff out cancer. They just have a hard time telling anyone about it.
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All this time, we thought Lassie was trying to tell us that Timmy had fallen into a well.
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Cats, meanwhile, know whether you have cancer or lots of other diseases. They just don’t care.
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Apparently, if you want to deliver a protest message to Congress, you should find a different way to get there than by gyrocopter.
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Doug Hughes of Florida flew low over the Washington Monument, across the National Mall, near the White House and landed on the lawn of the Capitol Building. By this time, the only people who hadn’t noticed him were Secret Service agents and the Capitol Police.
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Ironically, Hughes wanted to protest in favor of campaign finance reform, but he may get FAA reform instead, all while suddenly becoming more interested in prison reform.
---
In the end, it was no big deal. Hughes was arrested and then released. Maybe Utah’s “Super Dell” Schanze should look into harassing Congress instead of owls.
An Alaska Airlines employee last week fell asleep in the cargo hold of a plane, then had to bang on the ceiling for help when he woke up and discovered the plane was in flight. Officials said this incident should serve as a wakeup call. “Wake up call? That would have been nice,” said the employee who fell asleep.
---
ABC News said the sleepy baggage handler has a Facebook page that lists him as having studied “the art of sleeping” at “Sleeping University.” That’s where the mascot is a sloth, every cheerleader is a dream date, exams are a nightmare and the football team is everyone’s favorite sleeper pick.
---
The baggage handler would have been safe in the cargo hold, which was pressurized to accommodate pets in transit. But it’s no fun down there. Instead of peanuts, you get complimentary kibble.
---
When the plane landed, the baggage handler was overheard telling authorities, “Please don’t tell my boss.”
---
Meanwhile, the flying public is just hoping airlines don’t use this as an excuse to cram more people onto each flight. You think flying is rough today. Wait until you long to be upgraded out of the baggage compartment.
---
Life is unfair. The baggage handler had an epically subpar day at work, and now he’s in trouble. Jordan Spieth had an epically subpar day at the Masters and he got a brand new green jacket.
---
Recent tests show dogs can sniff out prostate cancer in men with 98 percent accuracy. However, the tests also revealed that dinner guests at your house do not appreciate undergoing the procedure.
---
It’s true that dogs can sniff out cancer. They just have a hard time telling anyone about it.
---
All this time, we thought Lassie was trying to tell us that Timmy had fallen into a well.
---
Cats, meanwhile, know whether you have cancer or lots of other diseases. They just don’t care.
---
Apparently, if you want to deliver a protest message to Congress, you should find a different way to get there than by gyrocopter.
---
Doug Hughes of Florida flew low over the Washington Monument, across the National Mall, near the White House and landed on the lawn of the Capitol Building. By this time, the only people who hadn’t noticed him were Secret Service agents and the Capitol Police.
---
Ironically, Hughes wanted to protest in favor of campaign finance reform, but he may get FAA reform instead, all while suddenly becoming more interested in prison reform.
---
In the end, it was no big deal. Hughes was arrested and then released. Maybe Utah’s “Super Dell” Schanze should look into harassing Congress instead of owls.
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