A lighthearted look at news of the day:
We’ve got this all wrong. We should be letting people who have been in West Africa roam free and quarantine the politicians.
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Kaci Hickox, a nurse who had been to West Africa, defied authorities in Maine last week and went for a bike ride, all the while being followed by media and health officials who wanted to be the first to be infected should she exhibit symptoms of Ebola.
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You can’t blame Hickox. Nothing is more relaxing than a bike ride through rural Maine with a police car and a contingent of reporters.
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Maine officials are seeking a court order to have Hickox quarantined. She hired a civil rights attorney to fight for the right to roam freely. Unfortunately, the Ebola virus doesn’t have the patience to wait for this to wind its way through the court system.
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The White House says someone hacked into the administration’s computers. No one knows for sure who did it, but officials might want to be on the lookout for a shirtless Russian leader trying to make purchases on a credit card with Barack Obama’s name on it.
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The president knew something was up when he noticed a new high score on his World of Warcraft game.
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Speaking of computers, Microsoft founder Bill Gates has announced he will turn his attention to fighting Ebola in Africa. In response, West Africa just came out with Ebola 2.0.
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Democrats are busy drawing attention to how the nation’s unemployment rate is dropping. It’s probably not a good sign for them that they seem so suddenly obsessed with unemployment.
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I wouldn’t say the president is pessimistic about Tuesday, but rumor has it the White House has been ordering extra heavy-duty veto pens off Amazon.
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If they win, Republicans plan to keep sending repeals of Obamacare to his desk in hopes that one day, by accident, he’ll sign on the wrong line.
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Meanwhile, Capitol police are getting ready to restripe the roads around Washington so they allow right turns only.
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Cosmopolitan magazine has a unique way of encouraging young ladies at North Carolina State University to vote Tuesday. The school won a contest, so the magazine will take young ladies to the polls on busses loaded with snacks, prizes and shirtless male models. In the true spirit of democracy, they ought to switch the models with men chosen at random from the nearest Walmart.
We’ve got this all wrong. We should be letting people who have been in West Africa roam free and quarantine the politicians.
---
Kaci Hickox, a nurse who had been to West Africa, defied authorities in Maine last week and went for a bike ride, all the while being followed by media and health officials who wanted to be the first to be infected should she exhibit symptoms of Ebola.
---
You can’t blame Hickox. Nothing is more relaxing than a bike ride through rural Maine with a police car and a contingent of reporters.
---
Maine officials are seeking a court order to have Hickox quarantined. She hired a civil rights attorney to fight for the right to roam freely. Unfortunately, the Ebola virus doesn’t have the patience to wait for this to wind its way through the court system.
---
The White House says someone hacked into the administration’s computers. No one knows for sure who did it, but officials might want to be on the lookout for a shirtless Russian leader trying to make purchases on a credit card with Barack Obama’s name on it.
---
The president knew something was up when he noticed a new high score on his World of Warcraft game.
---
Speaking of computers, Microsoft founder Bill Gates has announced he will turn his attention to fighting Ebola in Africa. In response, West Africa just came out with Ebola 2.0.
---
Democrats are busy drawing attention to how the nation’s unemployment rate is dropping. It’s probably not a good sign for them that they seem so suddenly obsessed with unemployment.
---
I wouldn’t say the president is pessimistic about Tuesday, but rumor has it the White House has been ordering extra heavy-duty veto pens off Amazon.
--
If they win, Republicans plan to keep sending repeals of Obamacare to his desk in hopes that one day, by accident, he’ll sign on the wrong line.
---
Meanwhile, Capitol police are getting ready to restripe the roads around Washington so they allow right turns only.
---
Cosmopolitan magazine has a unique way of encouraging young ladies at North Carolina State University to vote Tuesday. The school won a contest, so the magazine will take young ladies to the polls on busses loaded with snacks, prizes and shirtless male models. In the true spirit of democracy, they ought to switch the models with men chosen at random from the nearest Walmart.
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