A lighthearted look at news of the day
University of Michigan tight end Jake Butt just signed an endorsement deal with Charmin. Now he's hoping to clean up in the NFL.
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With a name like Jake Butt, you're bound to be a … well, shall we say a "focus" of some jokes, especially when you're a tight end. Too bad he isn't a defensive lineman. Then he could flush quarterbacks out of the pocket.
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Utah Rep. Jason Chaffetz will miss several weeks of work in Congress because of foot surgery. He injured the foot several years ago falling off a ladder, which is unusual. Members of Congress generally injure a foot by having it stuck in their mouths too much.
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President Trump unveiled a tax plan last week that isn't really a plan at all. It's more of a tax general statement. Put it this way, if you were shipwrecked on an island and Trump said he had a plan, it would be like, "We'll get across the ocean to safety, after taxing you less."
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The world is getting restless as the United States seems to be running out of diplomatic options, its patience growing thin and its military on alert. Just one more act of belligerence and Canada gets it.
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President Trump is angry at Canada over what he considers unfair subsidies to Canadian lumber. He may trigger a trade war by placing tariffs on Canadian wood. This explains why Trump wants huge tax cuts for Americans. We're going to need the extra money to pay for the sudden increase in new home construction.
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Meanwhile, Trump has ordered a review of both the Bears Ears and Grand Staircase-Escalante monuments in Utah, with the aim of possibly changing or revoking them. He may reach what we now call a "united" decision. That is, he would drag the sites off the list of monuments kicking and screaming.
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Presidents are starting to feel so strongly about monuments in Utah that one of these days one of them might actually visit one.
University of Michigan tight end Jake Butt just signed an endorsement deal with Charmin. Now he's hoping to clean up in the NFL.
---
With a name like Jake Butt, you're bound to be a … well, shall we say a "focus" of some jokes, especially when you're a tight end. Too bad he isn't a defensive lineman. Then he could flush quarterbacks out of the pocket.
---
Utah Rep. Jason Chaffetz will miss several weeks of work in Congress because of foot surgery. He injured the foot several years ago falling off a ladder, which is unusual. Members of Congress generally injure a foot by having it stuck in their mouths too much.
---
President Trump unveiled a tax plan last week that isn't really a plan at all. It's more of a tax general statement. Put it this way, if you were shipwrecked on an island and Trump said he had a plan, it would be like, "We'll get across the ocean to safety, after taxing you less."
---
The world is getting restless as the United States seems to be running out of diplomatic options, its patience growing thin and its military on alert. Just one more act of belligerence and Canada gets it.
---
President Trump is angry at Canada over what he considers unfair subsidies to Canadian lumber. He may trigger a trade war by placing tariffs on Canadian wood. This explains why Trump wants huge tax cuts for Americans. We're going to need the extra money to pay for the sudden increase in new home construction.
---
Meanwhile, Trump has ordered a review of both the Bears Ears and Grand Staircase-Escalante monuments in Utah, with the aim of possibly changing or revoking them. He may reach what we now call a "united" decision. That is, he would drag the sites off the list of monuments kicking and screaming.
---
Presidents are starting to feel so strongly about monuments in Utah that one of these days one of them might actually visit one.
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