A lighthearted look at news of the day:
Thanks to Mitt Romney, millions of marriages are in jeopardy, as husbands have to think up an answer to, “So why didn’t you write MY name in for president in 2016?”
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Romney told the Deseret News and KSL editorial boards he wrote in his wife’s name for president because he didn’t like either major candidate in 2016, and word is he voted for her only because she promised to consider him for secretary of state.
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At long last, President Trump has decided to put a stop to our national nightmare — the flood of cheap goods from Canada.
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Trump imposed a 25 percent tariff on imported steel from Canada, citing it as necessary for national security. The crazy thing is he is completely ignoring the biggest threat from up north, Justin Bieber.
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The announced tariffs also extend to Mexico, which said it would retaliate in-kind. Sure it’s all fun and games until you need chips and salsa for your next Super Bowl party.
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And the European Union will get tariffs, too, which led officials there to talk about raising duties on bourbon, leading thousands of anguished Utahns to say, “What’s that?”
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Don’t worry, friends. Diet Coke is still made here in the USA.
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Trump says U.S. trade is all out of whack. But it’s a little hard for the U.S. to complain about fairness with any sort of moral authority. After all, we’ve put the same two teams in the NBA finals four years in a row.
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To put this in perspective, there are 30 teams in the NBA, and 28 of them are not Cleveland or Golden State. To put it in further perspective, remember that the people of Minnesota rejoiced in 2015 (the first year of Cleveland-Golden State) because their team had the first pick in the draft, which they thought meant they had a chance.
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Some people say Cleveland and Golden State are in a league of their own. Others say that would be a great solution.
Thanks to Mitt Romney, millions of marriages are in jeopardy, as husbands have to think up an answer to, “So why didn’t you write MY name in for president in 2016?”
---
Romney told the Deseret News and KSL editorial boards he wrote in his wife’s name for president because he didn’t like either major candidate in 2016, and word is he voted for her only because she promised to consider him for secretary of state.
---
At long last, President Trump has decided to put a stop to our national nightmare — the flood of cheap goods from Canada.
---
Trump imposed a 25 percent tariff on imported steel from Canada, citing it as necessary for national security. The crazy thing is he is completely ignoring the biggest threat from up north, Justin Bieber.
---
The announced tariffs also extend to Mexico, which said it would retaliate in-kind. Sure it’s all fun and games until you need chips and salsa for your next Super Bowl party.
---
And the European Union will get tariffs, too, which led officials there to talk about raising duties on bourbon, leading thousands of anguished Utahns to say, “What’s that?”
---
Don’t worry, friends. Diet Coke is still made here in the USA.
---
Trump says U.S. trade is all out of whack. But it’s a little hard for the U.S. to complain about fairness with any sort of moral authority. After all, we’ve put the same two teams in the NBA finals four years in a row.
---
To put this in perspective, there are 30 teams in the NBA, and 28 of them are not Cleveland or Golden State. To put it in further perspective, remember that the people of Minnesota rejoiced in 2015 (the first year of Cleveland-Golden State) because their team had the first pick in the draft, which they thought meant they had a chance.
---
Some people say Cleveland and Golden State are in a league of their own. Others say that would be a great solution.
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