A lighthearted look at the news of the day:
In retrospect, it may have been a bad idea to feed Robert Mueller a plate full of lemons for breakfast on the day of his congressional testimony.
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Robert Mueller’s testimony last week was disastrous. The last thing Americans of all political stripes wanted was someone who looked like a professor telling them to read the book.
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We haven’t seen television this riveting since police chased O.J. Simpson at 10 mph down the freeway. At least then, everyone felt some sense of relief when it finally ended.
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Mueller said it may be possible to indict the president once he leaves office, which means President Trump will be holed up in the oval office for a while.
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Christmas came early in Washington this year. Everyone got what they wanted, the Grinch won’t stand in the way of the debt ceiling and none of the Whos in Whoville will have to worry about money again until after the election.
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If you ran your household the way both parties run Washington, you would open a home equity line of credit, run your credit cards past their limits, buy everything you and your spouse desire, tell the kids they will have to pay for everything eventually, then declare victory for everyone concerned and go on vacation.
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Oh, and then when the bills get out of hand, you could just print more money.
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The bipartisan budget deal would add a couple of trillion to the national debt, but think of all the frequent flyer miles we’ll rack up.
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Britain’s new prime minister is Boris Johnson. When you take him, North Korea’s Kim Jung-Un and President Trump, it adds up to one lousy time for the hairdressers of the world.
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To be fair, Boris Johnson’s hair looks like any of us would look with bed head … if we slept on a mattress made of steel wool.
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Utah County is launching a new pilot project to let military vets vote from their smartphones. Is it really such a good idea for people to vote from their phones? Something tells me if we had done this a few years ago, “angry cat” might have been elected president.
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This week’s Darwin Award goes to a young man in Herriman who chose the exact moment a police cruiser drove up to light fireworks in a restricted area. The launching device tipped over, shooting an explosive into the grill of the cruiser, then another into a field, igniting a fire. Timing, as they say, is everything.
In retrospect, it may have been a bad idea to feed Robert Mueller a plate full of lemons for breakfast on the day of his congressional testimony.
---
Robert Mueller’s testimony last week was disastrous. The last thing Americans of all political stripes wanted was someone who looked like a professor telling them to read the book.
---
We haven’t seen television this riveting since police chased O.J. Simpson at 10 mph down the freeway. At least then, everyone felt some sense of relief when it finally ended.
---
Mueller said it may be possible to indict the president once he leaves office, which means President Trump will be holed up in the oval office for a while.
---
Christmas came early in Washington this year. Everyone got what they wanted, the Grinch won’t stand in the way of the debt ceiling and none of the Whos in Whoville will have to worry about money again until after the election.
---
If you ran your household the way both parties run Washington, you would open a home equity line of credit, run your credit cards past their limits, buy everything you and your spouse desire, tell the kids they will have to pay for everything eventually, then declare victory for everyone concerned and go on vacation.
---
Oh, and then when the bills get out of hand, you could just print more money.
---
The bipartisan budget deal would add a couple of trillion to the national debt, but think of all the frequent flyer miles we’ll rack up.
---
Britain’s new prime minister is Boris Johnson. When you take him, North Korea’s Kim Jung-Un and President Trump, it adds up to one lousy time for the hairdressers of the world.
---
To be fair, Boris Johnson’s hair looks like any of us would look with bed head … if we slept on a mattress made of steel wool.
---
Utah County is launching a new pilot project to let military vets vote from their smartphones. Is it really such a good idea for people to vote from their phones? Something tells me if we had done this a few years ago, “angry cat” might have been elected president.
---
This week’s Darwin Award goes to a young man in Herriman who chose the exact moment a police cruiser drove up to light fireworks in a restricted area. The launching device tipped over, shooting an explosive into the grill of the cruiser, then another into a field, igniting a fire. Timing, as they say, is everything.
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