A lighthearted look at news of the day:
Finally, we now know the identities of the dastardly 1 percent that Bernie Sanders keeps going on about. It’s all those Iowans who made up the difference between him and Hillary Clinton.
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Hillary almost lost the caucus because she reportedly decided to do a get-out-the-vote campaign by email – using her lapsed State Department account.
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As part of its investigation into Clinton’s use of a personal email account for top-secret communications, the FBI has begun probing whether other former secretaries of state did the same thing. Henry Kissinger is exempt because during his tenure, email was a typo.
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Donald Trump has accused Ted Cruz of stealing the Iowa caucus by being mean to Ben Carson, a candidate whose supporters Trump once called “stupid.” I wouldn’t say Republicans are acting like high school kids, but while they’re fighting, people are starting to pay attention to all those “vote for Pedro … er, Marco” signs.
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Now that Trump and Carson are friends again, maybe they can get together this weekend and prank call Carly Fiorina to see what she really thinks of them.
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After the Iowa caucus, Rick Santorum dropped out of the race. Pundits are speculating over which candidate will inherit all his support, but it turns out his wife Karen isn’t going anywhere.
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Rand Paul, Mike Huckabee and Martin O’Malley also dropped out of the race, which affected voters in the way it might affect you to know your fourth cousin’s uncle from a previous marriage won’t be coming to Easter dinner.
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Jeb Bush probably should drop out, but the decision isn’t easy. How would you like to sit around the dinner table as the son who only amounted to governor?
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President Obama said last week he will propose a $10 tax on each barrel of oil in his next fiscal budget. This had industry leaders worried until they realized Congress was still mulling the budget Obama sent them in 2009.
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Sesame Street has moved to HBO. From now on, only the kids whose parents can afford a subscription will learn the alphabet.
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I won’t say the new Sesame Street is more upscale than the older, free version, but it is interesting to note that Oscar the Grouch has moved from his trash can to Cancun.
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Two weeks have passed and the Utah Legislature has yet to do anything that embarrasses the state. It’s as if no one even bothers to try any more.
Finally, we now know the identities of the dastardly 1 percent that Bernie Sanders keeps going on about. It’s all those Iowans who made up the difference between him and Hillary Clinton.
---
Hillary almost lost the caucus because she reportedly decided to do a get-out-the-vote campaign by email – using her lapsed State Department account.
---
As part of its investigation into Clinton’s use of a personal email account for top-secret communications, the FBI has begun probing whether other former secretaries of state did the same thing. Henry Kissinger is exempt because during his tenure, email was a typo.
---
Donald Trump has accused Ted Cruz of stealing the Iowa caucus by being mean to Ben Carson, a candidate whose supporters Trump once called “stupid.” I wouldn’t say Republicans are acting like high school kids, but while they’re fighting, people are starting to pay attention to all those “vote for Pedro … er, Marco” signs.
---
Now that Trump and Carson are friends again, maybe they can get together this weekend and prank call Carly Fiorina to see what she really thinks of them.
---
After the Iowa caucus, Rick Santorum dropped out of the race. Pundits are speculating over which candidate will inherit all his support, but it turns out his wife Karen isn’t going anywhere.
---
Rand Paul, Mike Huckabee and Martin O’Malley also dropped out of the race, which affected voters in the way it might affect you to know your fourth cousin’s uncle from a previous marriage won’t be coming to Easter dinner.
---
Jeb Bush probably should drop out, but the decision isn’t easy. How would you like to sit around the dinner table as the son who only amounted to governor?
---
President Obama said last week he will propose a $10 tax on each barrel of oil in his next fiscal budget. This had industry leaders worried until they realized Congress was still mulling the budget Obama sent them in 2009.
---
Sesame Street has moved to HBO. From now on, only the kids whose parents can afford a subscription will learn the alphabet.
---
I won’t say the new Sesame Street is more upscale than the older, free version, but it is interesting to note that Oscar the Grouch has moved from his trash can to Cancun.
---
Two weeks have passed and the Utah Legislature has yet to do anything that embarrasses the state. It’s as if no one even bothers to try any more.
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