“We are with you,” President Trump told the people of Puerto Rico in his State of the Union speech. That would have made Puerto Ricans feel better if they had the electricity necessary to hear him.
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FEMA officials allegedly relayed the message the next day as they announced they were ending emergency food and water distribution to the island.
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People who listened to the president’s speech last week apparently had a different reaction to it than those who watched it. And when it came to the Democratic response from Rep. Joe Kennedy, those who only listened on the radio missed all the drooling.
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Kennedy blamed what looked like drool on excess Chapstick that caught the television lights wrong. Most Americans reacted to this explanation by saying, “There was a Democratic response to the State of the Union?”
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Give the Democrats credit. They showed they are ready to move away from the party’s old guard of Clinton-era leadership, and on to a Kennedy.
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Will the indignities of commercial air travel never end? Now we find that United Airlines has refused to let a woman carry her emotionally supportive peacock onboard a flight.
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Sure, the peacock was big and heavy and full of expansive plumage, but so, apparently, were this passenger’s emotional needs.
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Of course, the TSA wouldn’t have even noticed the bird, except that it tried to go through security with a tiny set of nail clippers.
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TSA officials say they have seen people try to carry service monkeys and comfort pigs onto flights. Actually, pigs can be a comfort, especially if they’re in a blanket.
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Don’t act so smug or incredulous. This is nothing new. More than a century ago, lots of people came here with their comfort oxen and service horses.
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Speaking of air travel, a flight from Oslo to Munich had to return shortly after takeoff because the toilets were out of order. The irony is that 85 plumbers were onboard, en route to a conference. Apparently, the plumbers offered to fix the problem, but only sometime between 8 a.m. and noon the following Tuesday.
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Hasbro has announced a new edition of Monopoly that encourages cheating. Players will receive cards encouraging them to steal from the bank or from each other. Sounds like the perfect gift for the family that feels just a bit too much love and unity.
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FEMA officials allegedly relayed the message the next day as they announced they were ending emergency food and water distribution to the island.
---
People who listened to the president’s speech last week apparently had a different reaction to it than those who watched it. And when it came to the Democratic response from Rep. Joe Kennedy, those who only listened on the radio missed all the drooling.
---
Kennedy blamed what looked like drool on excess Chapstick that caught the television lights wrong. Most Americans reacted to this explanation by saying, “There was a Democratic response to the State of the Union?”
---
Give the Democrats credit. They showed they are ready to move away from the party’s old guard of Clinton-era leadership, and on to a Kennedy.
---
Will the indignities of commercial air travel never end? Now we find that United Airlines has refused to let a woman carry her emotionally supportive peacock onboard a flight.
---
Sure, the peacock was big and heavy and full of expansive plumage, but so, apparently, were this passenger’s emotional needs.
---
Of course, the TSA wouldn’t have even noticed the bird, except that it tried to go through security with a tiny set of nail clippers.
---
TSA officials say they have seen people try to carry service monkeys and comfort pigs onto flights. Actually, pigs can be a comfort, especially if they’re in a blanket.
---
Don’t act so smug or incredulous. This is nothing new. More than a century ago, lots of people came here with their comfort oxen and service horses.
---
Speaking of air travel, a flight from Oslo to Munich had to return shortly after takeoff because the toilets were out of order. The irony is that 85 plumbers were onboard, en route to a conference. Apparently, the plumbers offered to fix the problem, but only sometime between 8 a.m. and noon the following Tuesday.
---
Hasbro has announced a new edition of Monopoly that encourages cheating. Players will receive cards encouraging them to steal from the bank or from each other. Sounds like the perfect gift for the family that feels just a bit too much love and unity.
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