"On Second Thought" is a weekly series of brief and lighthearted observations of current events.
I wouldn’t say Republicans are going overboard to woo Hispanic voters who fled the party in 2012, but look for them soon to propose making Spanish the official language.
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Republican leaders are rallying behind the need for immigration reforms that provide pathways to citizenship. This is what happens when a party wants to avoid its own pathway to oblivion.
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In addition to receiving a compromise on immigration, Hispanics who register as Republicans before the end of the month will qualify for a chance to win a set of lovely but obsolete tea party cups.
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Some Republicans say this rush to immigration reform is a bad idea that adds up to amnesty. Party leaders believe these folks are entitled to voice their opinions, so long as they speak in whispers and close the blinds first.
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The Utah Legislature, meanwhile, isn’t worrying about immigration this year. That’s because House Speaker Becky Lockhart is too busy trying to get the governor to veto the foolish bills she sends him.
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Lockhart actually chastised Gov. Gary Herbert last week for not vetoing more bills. That’s sort of like a boxer complaining that he isn’t getting hit in the head enough.
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Meanwhile, the nation’s economy apparently forgot to get a flu shot last year.
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The economy contracted in the last quarter of 2012, shocking people who took campaign rhetoric seriously.
❑ ❑ ❑
The Federal Reserve issued a statement saying the economy appears to have “paused in recent months.” Kind of like how the Kansas City Chiefs paused for the most recent NFL season.
❑ ❑ ❑
The Salt Lake metro area earned a rare trifecta last month. It was ranked as the best place to do business, one of the happiest places in which to work and the worst place to breathe.
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Proposed new sign at the state border: Welcome to Utah! Breathtaking scenery.
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American politicians may soon launch a fact-finding trip to China, trying to learn how hackers there were able to do what they have always wanted to do — successfully spy on U.S. media outlets.
❑ ❑ ❑
Both the New York Times and the Wall Street Journal reported last week that their computers had been hacked by Chinese interests. Other media outlets were checking their systems. It’s not as sinister as it sounds. The Chinese were just trying to get a jump on some good coupons.
❑ ❑ ❑
In order to make Beyonce feel at home during the Super Bowl halftime show, the NFL may want to suggest quarterbacks lip-sync their signal calling on Sunday.
❑ ❑ ❑
Television stations, meanwhile, don’t care whether the halftime music is live, just that Beyonce’s wardrobe doesn't malfunction.
❑ ❑ ❑
Chuck Hagel’s appointment as defense secretary is set to sail through the Senate. He faces only two obstacles — Republicans and Democrats.
Jay Evensen is the associate editor of the Deseret News editorial page. Follow him on Twitter @jayevensen.
I wouldn’t say Republicans are going overboard to woo Hispanic voters who fled the party in 2012, but look for them soon to propose making Spanish the official language.
❑ ❑ ❑
Republican leaders are rallying behind the need for immigration reforms that provide pathways to citizenship. This is what happens when a party wants to avoid its own pathway to oblivion.
❑ ❑ ❑
In addition to receiving a compromise on immigration, Hispanics who register as Republicans before the end of the month will qualify for a chance to win a set of lovely but obsolete tea party cups.
❑ ❑ ❑
Some Republicans say this rush to immigration reform is a bad idea that adds up to amnesty. Party leaders believe these folks are entitled to voice their opinions, so long as they speak in whispers and close the blinds first.
❑ ❑ ❑
The Utah Legislature, meanwhile, isn’t worrying about immigration this year. That’s because House Speaker Becky Lockhart is too busy trying to get the governor to veto the foolish bills she sends him.
❑ ❑ ❑
Lockhart actually chastised Gov. Gary Herbert last week for not vetoing more bills. That’s sort of like a boxer complaining that he isn’t getting hit in the head enough.
❑ ❑ ❑
Meanwhile, the nation’s economy apparently forgot to get a flu shot last year.
❑ ❑ ❑
The economy contracted in the last quarter of 2012, shocking people who took campaign rhetoric seriously.
❑ ❑ ❑
The Federal Reserve issued a statement saying the economy appears to have “paused in recent months.” Kind of like how the Kansas City Chiefs paused for the most recent NFL season.
❑ ❑ ❑
The Salt Lake metro area earned a rare trifecta last month. It was ranked as the best place to do business, one of the happiest places in which to work and the worst place to breathe.
❑ ❑ ❑
Proposed new sign at the state border: Welcome to Utah! Breathtaking scenery.
❑ ❑ ❑
American politicians may soon launch a fact-finding trip to China, trying to learn how hackers there were able to do what they have always wanted to do — successfully spy on U.S. media outlets.
❑ ❑ ❑
Both the New York Times and the Wall Street Journal reported last week that their computers had been hacked by Chinese interests. Other media outlets were checking their systems. It’s not as sinister as it sounds. The Chinese were just trying to get a jump on some good coupons.
❑ ❑ ❑
In order to make Beyonce feel at home during the Super Bowl halftime show, the NFL may want to suggest quarterbacks lip-sync their signal calling on Sunday.
❑ ❑ ❑
Television stations, meanwhile, don’t care whether the halftime music is live, just that Beyonce’s wardrobe doesn't malfunction.
❑ ❑ ❑
Chuck Hagel’s appointment as defense secretary is set to sail through the Senate. He faces only two obstacles — Republicans and Democrats.
Jay Evensen is the associate editor of the Deseret News editorial page. Follow him on Twitter @jayevensen.
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