A lighthearted look at news of the day:
Utah lawmakers are talking about raising the gasoline tax. No mention of whether that would reduce the exhaust coming from Capitol Hill.
---
So, we have Utah conservatives debating over how to raise taxes. Next thing you know, President Obama will begin talking about ways to help rich people keep more of their own money.
---
The Republican-controlled U.S. Senate wasted little time in sending a bill approving the Keystone XL Pipeline to President Obama’s desk. The only people in Washington likely to benefit over the next two years are the couriers who will keep their Fit Bits busy carrying bills and vetoes back and forth.
---
The Secret Service discovered a drone tangled in a tree on the White House lawn last week. Meanwhile, the president was wandering around saying, “Has anyone seen the stuff I ordered from Amazon’s quick delivery service?”
---
The Chinese manufacturer of the drone announced it would make future drones inoperable in airspace above the White House, subject to future trade negotiations between China and the U.S.
---
Apparently, the only things that definitely weren’t deflated at the Super Bowl yesterday were ticket prices. The NBA reportedly was so impressed by the publicity drummed up by deflate-gate that it is considering deflating basketballs during the playoffs.
---
A French court has ruled that parents may not name their baby Nutella, after the popular hazelnut spread. The parents, who apparently had their heart set on naming the child after something people put on bread, reportedly said, “This puts us in a jam.”
---
The French judge said Nutella was a trade name that would not be in the child’s interest. Of course, little Nutella could have grown up, moved to the United States and married Hershey, which, according to Babycenter.com, was a name some American parents gave their baby boys in 2014. This would be what is known as a delicious irony.
---
Sky Mall has filed for bankruptcy. This is awful news. Where will we go now for bark-colored faces to stick in our trees and kitty litter boxes that look like fancy Living Room end tables?
Utah lawmakers are talking about raising the gasoline tax. No mention of whether that would reduce the exhaust coming from Capitol Hill.
---
So, we have Utah conservatives debating over how to raise taxes. Next thing you know, President Obama will begin talking about ways to help rich people keep more of their own money.
---
The Republican-controlled U.S. Senate wasted little time in sending a bill approving the Keystone XL Pipeline to President Obama’s desk. The only people in Washington likely to benefit over the next two years are the couriers who will keep their Fit Bits busy carrying bills and vetoes back and forth.
---
The Secret Service discovered a drone tangled in a tree on the White House lawn last week. Meanwhile, the president was wandering around saying, “Has anyone seen the stuff I ordered from Amazon’s quick delivery service?”
---
The Chinese manufacturer of the drone announced it would make future drones inoperable in airspace above the White House, subject to future trade negotiations between China and the U.S.
---
Apparently, the only things that definitely weren’t deflated at the Super Bowl yesterday were ticket prices. The NBA reportedly was so impressed by the publicity drummed up by deflate-gate that it is considering deflating basketballs during the playoffs.
---
A French court has ruled that parents may not name their baby Nutella, after the popular hazelnut spread. The parents, who apparently had their heart set on naming the child after something people put on bread, reportedly said, “This puts us in a jam.”
---
The French judge said Nutella was a trade name that would not be in the child’s interest. Of course, little Nutella could have grown up, moved to the United States and married Hershey, which, according to Babycenter.com, was a name some American parents gave their baby boys in 2014. This would be what is known as a delicious irony.
---
Sky Mall has filed for bankruptcy. This is awful news. Where will we go now for bark-colored faces to stick in our trees and kitty litter boxes that look like fancy Living Room end tables?
RSS Feed