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On Second Thought for April 1, 2013

3/29/2013

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360050_ USA TODAY e-Newspaper
"On Second Thought" is a weekly, lighthearted view of current events.

Stadium of Fire generated some attention last week when organizers announced pop star Carly Rae Jepson will perform in Provo on the Fourth of July. Or at least she said she would return their calls … maybe.
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Aren’t you glad the annual show didn’t sign Psy, the other pop sensation of 2012? After dancing Gangnam Style all night, no one would have any energy left for fireworks.
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A new study found that adults are worse at texting and driving than teenagers. It’s true. I read it during a red light.
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Almost half the adults in the survey admitted to texting while driving, but they thought is was OK because they also were drunk.
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Federal budget cuts will lead to several U.S. airports losing their air traffic controllers. The FAA’s new slogan? “Coming in on a wing and a prayer.”
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Provo and Ogden are among the airports that will lose controllers. Actually, there is nothing to be worried about. Passengers will simply be asked to look out the window and report any suspicious flying objects nearby.
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President Obama last week urged Congress to take up immigration reform. Anything to avoid dealing with the budget.
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Actually, the president is set to release his own budget proposal soon, which he hopes Congress will pass. He would have better luck getting them fill out NIT brackets.
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The House and Senate both have passed separate budgets. Actually, they do have some things in common. Both are in English, and both use Arabic numerals. It’s just that one delves into the concept of negative numbers a bit more than the other.
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Pedro Quezada of New Jersey won the Powerball lottery last week, which entitled him to a lump sum check of $221 million. In a blink of an eye, he rocketed from a hard-working American immigrant to one of the hated 1 percent who needs to pay more in taxes.
Jay Evensen is the associate editor of the Deseret News editorial page. Follow him on Twitter @jayevensen.
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    Everyone likes to laugh. Some of us even like to groan occasionally. Well, you've come to the right place. "On second thought" is a weekly feature I  produce for the Deseret News, available on Mondays. But here you can read them as I think of them.
      Oh yes, and if you've got something even funnier, post it in the comments. If I like it, I may use it.

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