Jay Evensen
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On Second Thought for July 23, 2012

7/15/2012

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"On Second Thought" is a weekly feature in the Deseret News that takes a light-hearted look at current events.
  • Police say a man has been robbing banks in the West lately, using a note that says he has only four months to live. Faced with death, people often focus their priorities. In this case, the focus seems to be on $50s and $100s.
  • Maybe "rob banks" was the last check-off on his bucket list.
  • Or maybe he really has figured out a way to take it with him.
  • This is an interesting tactic. Perhaps he's playing the sympathy card, hoping banks will say, "Gee, let's let him take the money. Shouldn't his final months be spent amid jewels and fast cars?" But if he keeps doing this five months from now, we'll know he's dishonest.
  • Texas Gov. Rick Perry this week said he wants three things: President Obama to release his college transcripts, all candidates to become more transparent and Mitt Romney to ... to ... what was the third thing? Oops.
  • The Associated Press first reported that Gov. Perry wanted Romney to release more of his tax returns. Perry's staff quickly said that wasn't the case. Perry wants candidates to be transparent, not not if it hurts his own party.
  • Clearly, some former presidential candidates should be a bit less painfully transparent.
  • Police in England arrested a 17-year-old boy who tried to lunge at a person carrying the Olympic torch and steal it. Maybe he just wanted to light some briquettes for an evening barbecue.
  • Where would you put a stolen Olympic torch? In the back yard right next to your stolen jet plane, hijacked police car and original copy of The Scream?
  • The state of California has outlawed the sale of foie gras in restaurants. Some eateries, however, are offering it for free along with certain entrees. Is this what's known as "ducking" the law?
  • Of course, this strategy may not hold up in court. It's what is known as a "liver let die" attitude.


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    Everyone likes to laugh. Some of us even like to groan occasionally. Well, you've come to the right place. "On second thought" is a weekly feature I  produce for the Deseret News, available on Mondays. But here you can read them as I think of them.
      Oh yes, and if you've got something even funnier, post it in the comments. If I like it, I may use it.

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