On Second Thought is a weekly feature that takes a lighthearted look at current events.

The state announced last week that the Timpanogos Highway again has to face months of more construction work. The road, which originally was supposed to open in May 2011, has had more false starts than a track meet in an earthquake.
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Thanks to the missed deadlines and traffic snarls, Utahns now have come to dread these 10 words, “We’re from UDOT and we’re here to help your commute.”
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The Timpanogos Highway ought to qualify for federal stimulus money. After all, few projects seem so perpetually shovel ready.
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Contrary to public opinion, President Obama did not have the worst of all possible weeks last week. For instance, he didn’t order a drone strike on a litter of cute puppies.
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It was impressive, however, to see his administration angering State Department employees, conservative groups and then, in a perfect finale, the media. It sort of made his first-term fight with the Catholic Church look like, well … a tea party.
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I’ll say this, Obama has succeeded in uniting divergent groups. Word is AP reporters soon will be donning tricorn hats.
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So, the IRS was investigating conservative groups and now the government will be investigating those investigators, while people are urging an investigation into how the Justice Department investigated phone records from the Associated Press. Kids, there is a lesson here. Go to school to become an investigator.
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Abercombie & Fitch CEO Mike Jeffries says he wants only beautiful, slim people wearing his company’s clothes. So why is it those people seem to be wearing hardly any clothes at all in company advertisements?
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Maybe the clothes are so exclusive no one qualifies to wear them. What a brilliant marketing plan!
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Abercrombie & Fitch, meanwhile, has signed an international agreement to make sure garment workers in Bangladesh have safe working conditions. The company says it doesn’t want poor people wearing its clothes, just making them.

Jay Evensen is the associate editor of the Deseret News editorial page. Follow him on Twitter @jayevensen.

The state of Utah is expanding its air quality alert system to include six colors instead of three. But for the average citizen, the only important color is blue, which is what you turn when you no longer can breathe.
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At higher pollution levels, people will be encouraged to avoid outdoor exercise. From my observations, this is no problem for the vast majority of people, even on clear days.
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We’re happy to do our civic duty and remain sedentary. Would it help if we ate some chocolate, too?
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Utah’s valleys are the reason Santa Claus has to carry fog lights and specially designed reindeer oxygen masks on his sleigh.
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Why is it that when the government spends more money than it has, we call it a fiscal cliff and say it threatens the economy, but when Black Friday comes and average people spend more than they have, we cheer and say the economy is recovering?
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If a majority of Americans think it’s time to tax the rich more in order to solve the nation’s problems, why did so many people go ga-ga last week over the lottery, the only tax scheme that tries to fool the poor into giving up their rent money?
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The Powerball produced two winners last week. The bad news is they instantly went from the 47 percent to the 1 percent, which means, if Democrats get their way, they soon will be paying 39.6 percent. Got that?
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I don’t want to say negotiations to avoid the “fiscal cliff” in Washington are discouraging, but you might want to ask Santa for some rappelling equipment this year.
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A congressional committee held a hearing last week to consider getting rid of dollar bills and replacing them with coins. When asked their opinion, millions of holiday shoppers paused with their credit cards and smart phone payment apps in hand and said, “What are bills and coins?”
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Switching to dollar coins would save billions each year. Switching to thin air, which is where most of your money goes anyway, would save even more.
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Here’s an alternative for those who want to keep paper dollars: Reduce their size each year commensurate with the inflation rate. That would save paper and ink costs, and when a dollar becomes the size of something your paper shredder might produce, people will clamor for coins.
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You could hardly blame The People’s Daily in China for thinking The Onion was serious when it named North Korean leader Kim Jong Un the “sexiest man alive” last week. Say what you want about Western culture, we don’t generally joke about such things.
Jay Evensen is the associate editor of the Deseret News editorial page. Follow him on Twitter @jayevensen.

Some names were conspicuously absent at the Democratic National Convention, such as Simpson, Bowles, Standard and Poor’s.
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That’s not quite true. Vice President Joe Biden mentioned Simpson and Bowles, then blamed Republicans for not embracing their commission report. He was speaking through a remote camera in Bizarro Land.
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Isn’t it amazing how both Michelle Obama and Ann Romney lived in primitive log cabins with their husbands when they were first married?
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Democrats made it clear that they support gay marriage, which they call “marrying whoever you love” and abortion, which they call “controlling your own body,” and that they oppose the $16 trillion national debt, which they have decided not to call anything at all.
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On Wednesday, former President Clinton gave a rousing speech that had the crowd chanting, “Four more years!” The only trouble is, the Constitution won’t allow Clinton to serve four more years.
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The threat of rain forced President Obama to take his speech indoors. That’s too bad. Organizers had hoped that, with him speaking in a football stadium, channel-surfing viewers might have thought they had stumbled onto halftime of an NFL game.
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Shortly after the convention, the Obama administration found a new strategy for lowering the unemployment rate. Just get unemployed people to stop looking for work.
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A new jobs report found the unemployment rate dropped because more people gave up looking. That led the Federal Reserve Board to conclude that, because its previous attempts to stimulate the economy have failed, it may be time to stimulate the economy.
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Apparently, it’s peak season in Bizarro Land.
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Meanwhile, an arbitration panel decided that, with incompetent replacement referees roaming the field, it might be interesting to reinstate the players accused of trying to hurt opposing players for cash rewards, then see what happens.
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I won’t say football players are becoming more political, but after a recent devastating hit, a linebacker was heard asking the quarterback, “Are you better off than you were four seconds ago?”